Monkey see, Monkey do

Very happy with the results!

few days ago i googled how to select the best watermelons, and with my new found skills yesterday i went to my local grocery store, and picked out this lovely gem in the picture. i can confirm that there are no white crates deforming the redness of this fruit, and the taste is heavenly!
so how did i do it? keep reading my young apprentice! so the first thing is to look for the creamy yellow area where the watermelon was exposed to sunlight (as you can see in the picture) - the more yellow, the more sweet the melon would be. also look for dark green stripes - a melon with dark green stripes indicates that its been allowed to mature - means less white crates to likely appear in the edible parts. don't be put off by skin grazing like the picture as they don't influence the taste/melon. also pick up the melon, it should be alarmingly heavy for its size (no kidding i had to walk home with this one and my arms had a hell of a workout). when you pick it up, slap it. you should be holding it away from your body, not hugging it! what you're looking for is a thump similar to slapping yourself on the UPPER chest (not boobs! i know you were thinking it >.<) slap a few melons, and when you find one that matches the sound as closely as possible, that's your baby.
to make the taste even better, stick the watermelon in the fridge for about half a day to allow it to cool. watermelons used to be my best friend back in iraq when the electricity goes out and its super hot outside, i'd slice a melon and enjoy the lovely scenery of the river Tigris on the swings. today i woke up 2 hours ago (3am) excited to tear this one in half, like a little kid waking up to open christmas presents lulz it was seriously worth it. i can't stop smiling, this melon brought back so many wonderful memories <3