pretend clothes shopping & back pain

road rage victim LOL

my back... is killing me. the pain is just sufficiently there, not too painful that i can't move, and not painless so i can move. its basically there to remind me:

ohai yes i'm still here to annoy you. aww you can't walk straight? well fuck you suffer for your sins demon!

anyways i haven't been shopping for clothes in... 3 months. yeah ever since i got back from romania, i've been punishing myself. no job = no clothes. problem is, with work experience coming up, i am forced to go to shops and browse for clothes. the fact that i have to get something, and.. i have a limited budget just makes shopping no fun at all. with my back pain reaching to my shoulders today i felt so weak. having to do this shopping in a forced manner made me very uneasy to be around. this kind of stuff should be a solo mission. to add to the frustration, i want to lose the weight i put on after coming back from romania. i guess the bad news affected me in so many ways i haven't really looked at myself to examine the damage till now. better now than later right?
wrong, i have interviews and work experience coming up so now, really does need to be NOW and not tomorrow.

just looking at my planner puts me in panic theres so many things happening i have to get my stamina back and be prepared. didn't i say the worst is yet to come? well it feels like its already begun. what? 2 days later and i'm overflowing with things to do. heres just some of the things i need to sort out:
CRB forms, photocopy id stuff, order moar print cartridges, phone up FJ and tell her about my upcoming interviews, get my teeth checked out, shop for smart clothes, meet up with adviser, REVISE ffs revise :( , print out travel tickets, manually retrieve travel tickets, application forms, prepare for interviews, practice answers, background check those bastard rents, phone up that volunteer supervisor and ask about my morning work, bodyrawk, declutter work space, go to the meeting in that church o_O meh. the list is endless, as for self-development heres something close to what i have:

oh and today i got another interview <3 HA HA HA how about that? another thing to add to my list of to-do. i remain skeptical to the frequency of such things on such short notice and the likeliness of success in any of these. theres so many people out there better than me, more desperate than me, more deserving than me. alhamdu-allah for the wonderful blessings i just wish i could be more happy of all this... insha'allah.

needz moar powaa

to lift things. i went to hull today. i laughed so hard at mum's expression when she heard of my plans for today, which at an unexpected series of events, worked smoothly. i woke up late, of course, but blame that on my extra curricular activities, i.e. zombie slaying.

nevertheless, i improvised - ended up in the train station in time for my train. hull is such an easy town centre to navigate to! there are 2 shopping malls (at least i discovered 2...) and 2 high streets: the old and the new, which are somehow interlinked by an ally way making it so convenient! theres a market there too but i didn't go deep into the old town centre. today my objectives were to find something for graduation - oh and i tried nike lunar swift 2+ and lunar glide + - they were both super comfy but i prefer lunar swift as it was lighter and better fitting - plus the colours were amazing but i still find that new balance 1026 pair that i found in TKMaxx by far were much better quality, durability despite being slightly fugly.

nike lunar swift 2+ score: 8/10 too expensive

nike lunar glide + score: 7/10 too expensive but pretty o_o

new balance 1026 - these babies own! score: 9/10 fugly but amazing fit & support

i bought new smart shoes, the amazingly fitted smart trousers from warehouse, and 'basic' (probably referring to the design, its a little common imo) but amazing in quality shirt that complements any smart trousers very well - it looks so good, even better than my monsoon and miss n smart tops! i'm very happy with it :3
i also found amazing skinny jeans in stone white/ dimmed white colour that i have been eyeing for a while in the H&M store but i found in better quality at Zara, i think its cheaper too. i also bought a planner for next year from paperchase, a mask to exfoliate my face, which has been lighting up like a christmas tree full of bumps and lovely acne.. i dunno whats going on, perhaps because of the amount of travelling i've been doing? maybe because i've had less green tea, theres been more breakouts? i haven't been applying any makeup, so that isn't the problem... hmm. also my hand rash returned.. i did spaghetti yesterday, and i had steam cooking my hand causing it to become sensitized. considering the fact that i have sensitive hands, this sensation turns into dermatitis - g'dammit!
i think i broke the bank today, seriously... my weekend's money earned, went poof today ;_; time to retreat into shopping hibernation....
i started bodyrocking today - first exercise: transform your booty workout. it wasn't as bad as zuz made it sound.. i was doing the forms properly, without weights though since i'm a beginner, sweated a little... i don't feel like it did much :L meh.. i'll be doing another tomorrow along with weighing and sorting out my fridge, eating my fruits.... and yeah. i think i may go town tomorrow, i mean nottingham, well, maybe... because i really want the blazer to complement the trousers i bought regardless of the fact that it doesn't look great.. i need something that matches and the price on this baby is just too hard to resist. i'll probably get skipping rope too - but thats it! i'll be walking it there too insha'allah :3 exercise exercise exercise! i think my body is finally lean enough to carry out some fat exorcism LOL i don't get tired from a whole day's walking anymore, i need extra things to cause pain and suffering to fat.

shopping, exploring and uhh....

teeth whitening. i come here today, firstly because i am extremely uncomfortable wearing these 'miracle workers' crest 3d white strips. not only am i burping whitening-flavored... burps, but also, i can't close my mouth, they feel so weird!! no i'm not taking pictures because they look frikin ugly and disgusting!

aghh they are so disgusting..

why did i choose to do this? simple, graduation. despite how i am regretting everything this year, i want to set things right, or at least some things.. one of those are my teeth. if you know me, you'd know i love to smile and so i feel like this is an important step to getting myself back.. in a sense. no more depressed dania, time to be confident, no more regrets, no more feeling worthless, hopeless and out of touch with reality - i guess i just want to improve. over the past weeks i have spoken to so many people and given so much wonderful advice i don't know why i'm not following it myself! i need to listen to myself, so yeah. this week i have been travelling, exploring cities of the north of nottingham such as leeds, sheffield and derby. i have to say, i really liked derby's shopping centre 'westfield' its huge, spacious and has all my favorite shops.

awesome shop is sooo awesome! <3

i really loved the fashion in bershka - oh my oh my, i think this was the first ever store that i went into, and i spent at least an hour flicking through their wonderful fashion. they were all so wearable! i really liked their tshirts and how affordable everything was! it was amazing, even the staff were amazing, this is one shop i will revisit again and again, even if i have to go oxford street to see it!
eghh just took off the whitening strips. not only do they look gross but taking them off also looks gross. i hate the after-taste of whitening in my mouth. i don't know how i'm going to sleep tonight having half of what i had in my mouth, now lingering my stomach. i'm very very disturbed by these whitening strips. plus, it doesn't look like they did anything at all :L
back to my exploration - the city that i really found was architecturally stunning has to be sheffield. their town centre was a little difficult to navigate to, but i really enjoyed strolling (blindly) through the streets in my quest to find the shops! the moment that you step out of the train station you're welcomed by a beautifully designed  and complex fountain spanning the front of the station in different levels, reflecting the hills and breadth of sheffield. i found it very inspiring. the city looks very beautiful with the contrast of modern and archaic buildings - it really looks like a pretty place to live in.
so leeds, what did i think of leeds... well, it was a little further away than sheffield, and despite the popularity of the place by so many people i couldn't really agree. the shops were indeed spread out and i found the extra walking quite rewarding - but somehow it reminded me of nottingham, or to be more precise... a downgrade version of nottingham - i kinda prefer nottingham. with regards to sheffield's town centre shopping experience, i also prefer nottingham as it has way more shops, at a closer proximity and also easier to navigate to.
ofcourse, i took pictures but atm its kinda late to go through them, edit and upload them on here, so pics should be coming soon :3